What's the most ridiculous thing you did this weekend?

My weekend involved things like this:

Capuchin on a blue-tick.  I think that's a country song.

Mrs. 45er stated this is officially the most ridiculous thing she's ever seen.

Me?  I must live a weird life.  This falls in the middle-ground category.

New Breed of Poodle - The Perret?

Or maybe the Foodle?

I'm sorry, but if you're going buy a "poodle" at a market for that kind of dough and you can't tell the difference between a weaselly, slinky ferret and a poodle puppy, then you deserve what you get.



On the other hand, props to the seller for putting in the time to primp up a ferret like that.  I don't know what that would be like, but it had to be a rodeo.  It also seems like a whole lot of work pumping steroids and primping a ferret for a little payoff.  The article also mentioned a lady that bought a "chihuahua" ferret.  I'm kind of upset there wasn't a picture of that one.

Things that make me laugh

Bad guys getting a beat down by karma.

http://www.nbcnews.com/video/nbcnews.com/51393157/

This just made me chuckle.

Boy, you gotta panty on yo' head

Just made me laugh.

Thought I'd share

Bacon prophylaxis

Ok, so I LOVE some bacon.  I mean, really am IN love with it.  Usually, if it contains the "B" word, I'm all for it.

However, today I think I found my limit.

You betcha. Cured, smoked pork flavored prophylactics.  Really?

Because nothing says seksee like meat condoms

So that story led me to this story, which combines two of my favorite things.  Meet the BA K 47.

I think it's love.  If not, it's bacon and that's close enough

Inspiration at Wal Mart

Cruising through the aisles of the local box store, I was inspired to take a shot at some photographic still life art.

I call this one...

Change of Plans

We always see abandoned items in the store, but I thought the ones above told a particularly intriguing story.  Then, there was the decision by the store to pile a variety of items into one display.  This display I call...

Bin of Misery

Or relief, I guess, depending on your perpective.

Pounding Wet Sand

When we were looking at the house we own right now, I remember looking out the back door when it was being shown to us and thinking how the above-ground pool in the back yard was NOT a selling point.  All I could see was maintenance.  Well, we ended up with it.  It's been ok.  We use it.  I do maintain it.  Mostly.

So, this weekend came the series of unfortunate events leading to the multiple project payload.  You know what I'm talking about.

"Hmmmm, that hose is leaking.  Well, to fix that I have to drain the pool down.  Well, since I'm going to have to do that, I may as well replace the leaky inlet which I've been fighting.  Oh, you know since I'm doing that, I really should replace the sand in the filter."  This is where misery is born.

You see, you're supposed to replace that sand every few years.  Well, it's been a few years since we moved in and the previous owner didn't exactly take care of the pool.  The neighbors have told me stories involving tree-rats doing the bloated back-stroke and Swamp Thing colored water.  I can only imagine what has gone through that filter.

The purchase of the supplies was much less painful than I expected.  Therefore, I left the pool supply store much more optimistic than I had any right to be.  I decided to start early in the morning on the project instead of working in 103F heat.  I'm silly that way.  Still, it was HOT.

The inlet replacement was pretty simple.  Hoses took no time to attach.  I'm cranking along, super-happy with myself.  So, then I took the valve off of the filter and gazed into the abyss.  I would spend the next few hours lounging down there with Faust wanting to go in halvsies on the deal he made just to end this thing.

There is 200 pounds of sand in that filter.  That's dry weight.  This sand is wet.  Very wet.  Let's top that with the fact that there is a PVC pipe that comes all the way to the opening of the filter, which is already small.  I can barely fit my hand through.  I started shoveling with the little plastic cup that I had.  That lasted a very short time.  I've learned some things in life.  Don't ignore the voice telling you when you're doing something stupid.  It's always right.  Also, taking time to find a better solution always beats wasting a lot of time doing something and then trying to find a better solution.

I stopped pretty quick and headed to my parents' house to get their shop-vac.  My thoughts were this:  I would use their old shop-vac and if the vacuuming of sand burned it up, I would get them a brand new one.  Better than buying a new one and finding out the hard way.

Back to the house with the sucker.  Things went quite swimmingly until I got down to where the really wet stuff was.  Sadly, I was just starting to get that loving feeling back.  That's when the sand started actually filling up the hose.  Luckily, I had buckets of water I had collected when I drained the pool.  What's a good idea?  Sucking some of that up to clean the hose.  What's a bad idea?  The one I just had.  An even better idea would have been just wrapping tape on that stupid leaky hose that started all this.

So, now I have a very wet, very sand filled shop vac.  I'm on the 4th or 5th emptying of the thing and it's getting messy.  Oh, and really heavy.  So, the decision has to be made to either empty it a lot or blow a gasket every time I empty it.  I emptied it a lot.  A whole lot.  At this point I can't get the sand out of the bottom of the pool filter.  The pipe goes down and fits to a bunch of spokes that I can't get the hose under.  You know what did fit under it?  My hand.  My now very raw hand.  Scraping a bunch of wet sand into a hose has what I will call an exfoliating affect.

Finished sucking!  Now, haul the new sand to the back of the house.  Fifty pound bags of sand.  I'm reminded of hauling a bunch of cattle feed.  Feel the burn.

So, the project is finally complete.

Stupid hose.

Participation Award

That Guy wins my internet award.

Heh.

He gets...  his own participation award.

QOTD: "Community"

"Community" is a show on NBC.  If you haven't seen it, it is funny.  However, the humor is of a certain type that isn't for some.  Watching tonight I was laughing as my jaw hit the floor at this line:

"Not a lot of people get a second chance.  Just you...  and probably Obama."

Priceless.

It's all about ME

If this doesn't scream textbook narcissim and selfishness, I don't know what does anymore.

I would love to see some different takes on this through photoshop.  Fox News has a pretty good one on their home page right now.  My vision is Obama "helping" previous presidents with their greatest achievements.  I'll have to mess with this when I get home.

Obi-Wan Kenobi hits the skids

I wonder if his landspeeder license will be suspended.

Police said Kenobi's reckless driving caused the chain-reaction collision on March 19.

The media can't get enough of the Star Wars jokes.

My vote was decided at the local brewery

This is something I can be activist about.

This is something I am FOR

Tacocopters.

Real or fake, I have to admit the concept makes me smile.

Karma is holding on line one

You know, sometimes it comes calling.  If you're a jerk long enough and often enough, it's bound to catch up with you.  Don't be that person.  It might just save you from yourself.

Cool gun songs

If you haven't heard of FXHummel1, he covers songs and re-writes lyrics that are pretty incredible.  Sometimes they are funny, sometimes they are ranty (new word, trademarked) and sometimes they give you goosebumps. This one over at Everyday No Days Off is pretty awesome.  Check that one out then watch some other ones if you haven't heard his stuff.  If you're a gun nut (or even if you're not), you'll find yourself nodding your head to some of it and giggling out loud.

Schooled at the drive-through

I consider myself pretty effective at communication.  It is a skill that is required in my field.  I send messages in a corporate environment and even teach some classes.  I believe that clear communication is somewhat important.

I pulled into the drive-through of a local fried fish fast-food establishment for lunch today.  I was in a bit of a rush.  A product of today's budget crunching environment is the typical question "would you like some condiments."  I was lucky enough to be asked this time and I replied "one of each."  I received a simple nod and the window closed.  Now, my usual request is: one cocktail sauce packet, one tartar sauce packet, one ketchup packet and one malt vinegar packet.

The employee handed me my bag of food with a smile and I drove away.  When I arrived back at work and began pulling my lunch and condiments from the bag, I issued an audible laugh which garnered looks of concern or confusion from some co-workers (I couldn't really tell which).

My meal was simply a piece of fish, a piece of chicken, a few shrimp and a smattering of french fries.
From the bag containing my lunch, I extracted:

1 ketchup packet, check
1 tartar sauce packet, check
1 malt vinegar packet, check
1 cocktail sauce packet, check

along with:
1 hot sauce packet
1 lemon juice packet
1 buffalo wing sauce tub
1 spicy thai dipping sauce tub
1 ranch sauce tub
1 condiment cup filled with barbecue sauce
1 condiment cup filled with honey-mustard

Literally, one of each and every condiment in the establishment as I had requested.  Touche, drive-through employee, touche.  I had no idea they even had some of these sauces.  Words mean things and I failed the test.  Thanks for the humorous reminder and I'll be more specific next time.

Friggatriskaidekaphobia

No, I haven't developed a weird disorder nor am I speaking in tongues.

It's your word of the day.  It is the irrational fear of Friday the 13th (Happy Friday the 13th, by the way).

An alternative word is paraskevidekatriaphobia.

Your homework is to use it casually in a sentence today and not get slapped or arrested.  :)

Born This Way

I guess he was born a socialist?  Whatever, this is hilarious.

And yes, someone has way too much time on their hands.

On Communication, Food And Shopping

Mrs. 45er and I had a great day of shopping today.  There is a great town just North of here that has a huge and eclectic collection of shops and restaurants.  It's a very German town, so there is a lot of good beer, too.  There is also a fantastic kitchen store.  I can hear the collective eye-rolling from the guys, but this is something I actually enjoy doing with my wife.  Mostly because she shops like I do and we get to eat lots of great things.  

On Communication:

It's important.  I think I found the perfect tool for the married couples out there.  It gives a new meaning to the term "pillow talk".

Uhhhh

Or, more likely:

The dust-collecting side

We did a lot of wandering around and ended up in a candy store.  Nestled in between the chocolate and pectin-based fruit chews were these little boxes of joy.

Yum

Double Yum

Triple Yum

And before you ask, yes they are real.  What kid can't wait for their parents to go to the candy store and bring home a box of crunchy insects?  Tasty.  Ok, I can say I've had weirder things. 

If I was lost in the wilderness...  Maybe.

On the way out of the same store, there was this:

Yes, it says that

And yes, those are chocolate covered Jalapenos to the right.  I didn't try them or the chocolate covered pickles to the left (not shown).  This wasn't bad, but it really wasn't great.  I think with a better cut of bacon it could work.  The bacon needed to be cooked a little more to render more fat if you're serving it cold and give it a better crisp.  Anyways, now I can say I've had it.

Moving on, we got hot chocolate in a shop a few doors down and saw this:

Oh, the good old days.  I'm sure it had cologne of some kind in it.  This is the kind of town that had plenty of the old silver cap gun revolvers that brought back great memories for me.  The hot chocolate wasn't all that fantastic, so we kept moving.  

Next, it was the place with the great hot sauce/salsa for sale.  This place is fantastic.  It has almost everything right out there for you to taste.  I always end up leaving with something.  I also always have to head to the back room, which is the seventh level of hell for your tongue.

My kind of sign

By the way.  They aren't kidding around with that sign.  I tried a Bhut Jolokia sauce for the first time sitting on this table.  If you don't know what that is, it's between 850,000 and over 1 million on the Scoville Heat Unit Scale.  Habanero peppers top out at 350,000 or so and the puny Jalapeno is about 2,500 to 8,000 tops.  Needless to say, I didn't buy the sauce.  But I did try some things in this room:

The Inferno.  Dante is in the corner

You know, normal sounding sauces like:

Yes, they went there

And

So did they

So after this room, I go back to the front and Mrs. 45er asks me to try something to see how spicy it is.  My answer was pretty much "How the hell would I know, now?"  Subtle spice nuances were lost at this point.  It was all one burn.  I did end up with a great bacon chipotle grilling sauce.  I'll have to try it out and do a post on that later.

All this munching has kicked up our appetite, so it's time to get lunch.  We found a nice place downstairs under the kitchen store.  Almost all of the buildings here are pretty old and very not ADA approved.  So, we head down some very narrow stairs and walk into the restaurant.  The first thing that hits you is the smell of a flat-top grill doing its thing and the pungent smell of sauerkraut.  This place has a good looking turkey reuben on the menu.  However, that's not what I had my eye on.

Now, that is yummy

Pecan crusted chicken with a creole gravy served with rice and candied ginger carrots.  This was fabulous.  Mrs. 45er had a good old shepherd's pie.  It was a chilly day and this hit the spot.  It was a great day.  We ended up not breaking the bank, which is nice and got some great exercise which was more than offset by lunch and the cup o' creme brulee we had for dessert.  You've got to enjoy life.  :)

Giggle for the day - Mentos and Coke car

Don't tell GM about this.  They are probably looking for a replacement for the Volt right about now.