Funny, but it doesn't work when 250 pounds of angry, hairy, razor-sharp anger is bearing down on you.
Many years ago in my previous life, I was a professional hunting guide on a very large ranch with a large number of exotic animals. On this particular hunt, the client and I were stalking a trophy wild boar.
Stalking is not the best way to hunt for the best or biggest boar when you're a guide. Hunting from a blind is really the way to go. It allows the guide to inspect the pigs and make sure you were getting A. a boar and B. one with nice tusks. Tusks, after all are a big part of the package. Judging pigs is one of the more difficult things you have to do as a guide. What is visible is only a few inches and the rest of the tusk is hidden in the jaw. You have to hope that you get a look at both tusks from a fair distance in failing light and pray that one isn't chipped or broken.
In the below picture; note the upper (smaller) and lower boar tusks. You can see where they match up perfectly. This is where they constantly rub together, keeping the lower tusk nice and sharp. These are about 7 inches long, a little less than 3 of those pointed inches will be protruding from the gums.
We were stalking through an area that was cut through the "white brush." The ranch maintained the hunting areas by cutting down the thick brush to help with visibility and the new growth from the cut areas provided great forage for the animals. The "white-brush" in that part of Texas was unbelievably thick and thorny. These cuts were usually done in long, straight sections. In Texas, we call a long, straight clear section a "sendero." Senderos can be man-made or natural, but you know them when you see them and they offer great places to see game.
|Something like this|
The downside is that the hit was too far back and low which meant a serious track. The trail led right into the brush and I got down on my hands and knees to crawl (yes, crawl) after this wounded pig. I sent the hunter around the side of the brush to the next clear cut. I told him to be prepared if I pushed this one out and if it was the wounded one, he should take it. I had my rifle (Remington 700 in 7mm STW with a very LOUD muzzle brake) laid across my arms in the crooks of my elbows. As I crawled along I heard something to my right. I rolled and saw a large boar approaching quickly, apparently spooked by the hunter. Luckily, he saw me and stopped, then turned and trotted off. So much fun already.
This rifle holds two rounds in the magazine and one in the chamber without forcing things. That means I was empty. For this very reason, I keep an elastic ammunition holder on the stock. With the bolt open, I pulled one out, tossed it in the breech and closed the bolt just to be safe. I watched the pig for many tense minutes before making a move. When I was sure that I wasn't going to have a repeat of any of the previous excitement, I backed out. We retrieved the big guy from the other side after I had a chance to meet up with the client and relax a bit.
I have had many an exciting pig hunt, but this one by far takes the cake. At the time, Mrs. 45er and I were recently dating and I spoke with her on the phone almost every night. Needless to say, she was not pleased when I told her this story. I was excited and still running on adrenalin, I'm sure. I specifically remember her being less than thrilled. I think I was still invincible at that age.